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: Erotic_Stories : Straight as a question mark : From Naked in Paradise - total 3 reviews. 
Reviews 3 :
- read story, Author : len richmond. PS: Reviews num is regularly updated.
Straight as a question mark : From Naked in Paradise reviews
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Posted by Slm
I'm not sure what these comments should be, considering you've already published a book. Your writing style lends too heavily to an inner-monologue, disembodied sort of narrative. I'm not suggesting the other extreme of a blow-by-blow description; just attempt to give your reader a sequential sense of what's happening each moment. And finally, I say this not just because it's porn, but you could use more details and lingering descriptions. I appreciate you not using the "I woke up, looked at myself in the mirror, and began describing what I saw" device. Still, try to naturally introduce each new character. I hope that you will post more here in the future.
Posted by jayson heart
Dats a well written story...ppl kan text me (323)4553448 or email me lancebailey@tmail.com iam fuckin horny
Posted by jayson
That pretty cool I want 2 get fucked like that jus needs better ending
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