Posted by Mike This story started off great - but then it seemed to be in a hurry to get finished - things happened too quickly and without explanation or reason.
Pity!!
Try re-writing it - take more time to develop your characters - move more slowly into the sex - make sure the reader understands either explicitly or implicitly why things happen - then you've got a good story - worth a 7 or 8 rather than the 2 I gave it.