When hearts collide : Part 1

(Part 1 from 1. Fiction.)

I literally ran from my car all the way down the hallway. My heart was beating fast, and I was scared. I knew I had been wrong to let Tristan walk away from me in that state, and I was just hoping he would understand. It was just a setup at first, but then I really fell for him. Now I'm in love with him, but I’m too much of a coward to tell him.

As I turned the last corner towards our homeroom, I met a few students running away from the classes, and some of them were even screaming! There was a lot of buzz going on; the police were also running towards the homeroom trying to block people from going toward the classes. I did not pay any attention to them, though, I just ran straight through them. Had I been in a sane mind, I would have known that something was really wrong...especially the fire truck, the ambulances, all the police cars, and news crew cars outside in the parking lot.

I pushed it all to the back of my mind. As I came to the class, my heart must have skipped a beat because I wasn't prepared for the scene that met me. Tristan was standing between Nicolai and that kid, Jared, a very frail and confused kid who looked as if he just woke up and came to school, he was wearing some black baggy jeans and a black hoodie with red stripes.

His black hair was cut in a crew cut, and his grey eyes were stone cold and bloodshot. He was about 6’1,” very thin, and was pointing a gun towards Tristan and Nicolai. I could tell all of them were scared out of their wits, as even though Jared was holding a gun, he was screaming and tears were running freely down his face. As I got closer to the room, I could see some other students all huddled in a corner. Tristan, due to his naturally sweet-naturedness was trying to talk some sense into Jared.'

"I know how hard it is, but believe me it, gets better...please just don't do it..." '

"Shut up Tristan!" Jared shouted, and both Tristan and Nicolai flinched with fear. "You don't know anything, and this bastard doesn't deserve to live. Now move so I can kill the bastard already" Jared said as he tried to point the gun at a very frightened Nicolai who was crouching on the ground behind Tristan. '

"Actually, I know exactly how you feel, and I have been in your situation....but please don't kill him. It won't help anyone if you do..." '

"Yeah, listen to what he's saying" Nicolai said, shaking. I had never before seen him that scared before. Everyone had gone quiet for a moment, Nicolai was now laying on the ground. I don't know why but the room was starting to become hazy; I was wondering what was going on, I could hear my heart beat and I realized that my tears that were blurring my vision. I had not comprehended I was crying. Somewhere in the classroom a phone started ringing, breaking the silence, and the ringtone was “Flowers for a Ghost” by Thriving Iron.

Jared looked around like a maniac and shouted, more as a command than a question, "Whose bloody phone is that!” and he paced up and down between Nicolai and Tristan.

Everything seemed to be in slow motion. "... uhm ... uhm ... okay just let me be I prom...." Nicolai said.

"I... I ... t...old you to shut up" Jared almost whispered as he loaded the gun. There was a click as the bullet was locked into place, and he started walking towards Tristan and Nicolai.

"Please Jarred don't, this is a mistake... think about the consequence of shooting Nick. I know you don't mean to, and he doesn't even deserve to live, but let the police deal with him." Tristan said, taking a step back with caution.'

“He always gets away with shit, and I'm done." Jared said as he lifted the gun to his head, scratched his head with it, then wiped some tears with his free hand. The cell phone that had gone quiet started ringing again. Jared was now pacing up and down; the other two were deep in conversation as Nicolai stood up from the ground, and ran to Jared. They started fighting for the gun, as he thought Jared was occupied with what Tristan was saying, and Tristan was now left standing alone at the opposite of the two fighting boys.


This is when he looked up to me, as I was now standing across looking directly into his eyes. I could see fear etched deep in his soul. As I was caught up at looking at Tristan, the cell phone rang for the third time, "Hell I'm only human said I'm only human said I'm only human said I'm only human I'm human I'm human I'm hum.....an ... oh hooo Yea yea yea oh hoo yea yea yea."

First, there was silence, but then a piercing sound shot through the hallway, sealing the gunshot. For a moment, everything froze, and I could still see Tristan standing across me. Somehow the two fighting boys had triggered the gun, and a shot was fired. Everyone had dropped to the ground. The song continued, "I'm human I'm human." In an instant, Tristan grasped and coughed before blood ran from his mouth down his chin. He touched his stomach and brought his hand to watch the blood from his gun wound, then he fell backwards. Time stood still as my heart shattered into a million tiny fragments when I saw my only love falling; as he had been shot.

The tears that had been hovering at the edge of my eyes started falling down freely again as I ran towards Tristan. Jared began to fall when Nicolai hit him with the gun's but. I saw Nicolai run towards Tristan; I ran towards him, too, and knelt next to him. I stood up and charged at Nicolai, "You bastard it's all your fault, you... you killed him" I cried as I punched him hard in the face. Somewhere in the background I heard some scream from one student in the corner, followed by an agonized scream from Tristan. I turned back to Tristan and knelt next to him as Nicolai fell on his back from my punch.

He was trying to smile, but his eyes were filled with tears, finally he looked at me and said, "I'm... I'm...m"

"Sssh" I shushed him seeing he was struggling to breath and talk."Stay with me babes, please,” I implored him.

He smiled again "You ... called me ... babes..." He choked on his own blood as he reached up and gently wiped the tears from my face. I screamed for the medics, but none were in sight. I started shaking and hugged him. "Troy I'm s..." He choked again, and the tears in his eyes started rolling down. His diary had fallen next to him, and he gave it to me. My own tears were now falling fast and hard. I felt someone pull me, Nicolai, who was also shaking and crying. The medics came and wanted to tend to Tristan.

"He can't die, he's not going to die he cannot leave me," I said as I was led away by a policeman. I saw Jared being cuffed and taken away, and Nicolai was also being taken away. I ran to him and wanted to beat the crap out of him, but was stopped by the same policeman who had stopped me before. I looked across to where Tristan was now being put in a stretcher. What I saw did nothing to comfort me; there was an oxygen mask on his face, and blood was slowly trickling down from his stretcher onto the floor where it had

gathered into a small pool.

I went and picked up his diary. The police were leading all the students outside the buildings, but I refused to leave Tristan as I sat on the ground next to him. Wondering what I had done, rather what we had done, I thought about the huge mistake I had made. Mistakes. We all make them, but sometimes, if we’re lucky, an eraser will do the trick,and we can rub it across the page, wiping away the dust and all that's left until our careless mistake is a barely noticeable smudge.

Some mistakes cannot be erased, no matter how young or old. I was in high school, tenth grade, that year I learned a lot. I learned how to drive, hack into the school's website, forge fake sick notes and hall passes, but by far the toughest lesson I learned was that life doesn't come with erasers. I can't make something that happened disappear. Certainly there's no eraser for reality. I was sixteen; I wished then and still do, I wish that I could just erase or imagine away what I did, or rather what we did, to Tristan.

He came from a different home than most of us, just one way he was different. Rumor had it he had tried to commit suicide before, and, on top of it all, he was a fag. "Hey faggot!" Nicolai would whisper under his breath every time we jumped him, whether in the homeroom or in the hallways. Nick could really be na've at times, bull, we all were. I didn't take him seriously when he got into his rich-kid old-money mood.

He'd entertain us with cruise stories, Hollywood gossip about how celebrities got six packs from using drugs, which girl he had fucked, and how he had fucked her. Nicolai would impress us all with his high pitched bragging voice, all his latest gadgets, and 2011 Mustang he drove to school. Actually, Nick was as insecure and pretentious as the rest of us. Everyone knew him as the kid who lived the exciting, fast life. They all had been learning together since kindergarten, and, at some point and time, Tristan was part of their small crowd. They also lived in a small town where everyone knew everyone.

Then there was Tristan, in his skinny jeans, graphic tees, long, waxy black hair, and strange ideas. If it had been only Nicolai who dug into Tristan, he could have probably handled the pressure. But we were all responsible...now here I am, sitting in an ambulance, with Tristan'

struggling to stay alive. It all sounds so confusing; I guess I should start from the beginning. I'm Troy Alexander, by the way, and I made the mistakes of a lifetime....this is my story.

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