Detention 15 - Conclusion (Part 1)

He walked off. Embarrassed isn’t a strong enough word to describe how I felt at that moment. I thought about what he had said, which was basically that I had been using him - which I had been doing. Luke was right in saying that I had taken advantage of his liking me without really liking him in return. I didn’t feel embarrassed because Luke had turned me down - because I deserved from the way I had treated him, but because of the way I had treated him, as though he were just someone I could use and throw away when I didn’t need him anymore. Slowly I walked off in the other direction.

* * *
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” 

I looked up and saw Eve towered over me, smoking a cigarette. She looked gorgeous in a pair of tight, low-cut indigo-colored jeans that made it clear that she wasn’t wearing underwear, and a black tube-top that emphasized her lean stomach and nice abs. Eve had better abs than most boys I’d seen. Of course she was out of dress code, but I don’t think any of the faculty had the balls to tell her. She sat down in the grass beside me. She smelled like strawberries. “You look like you’re fuckin’ favorite puppy died or somethin’.”

I laughed even though I didn’t want to. “I’m okay,” I said.

“Don’t give me that fake bullshit. Just tell me what’s wrong with you.”

“I don’t really like talking about my problems to other people,” I told her.

“And I don’t really like hearing other people’s problems,” Eve said. “But tell me before I put this cigarette in your eye.” 

“It’s just been a whole lot of shit going on that I’ve had to deal with.”

“I know it has to deal with that dude you’re messin’ with, Chris Green. You two haven’t fucked and made up yet?” 

“He hasn’t been to school in the past couple of days. I haven’t been able to talk to him.”

“Do you know where he lives?” Eve asked.

“Yeah, his friend Billy told me last night. I thought about going over there last night. But it was too late -”

“What the fuck do you mean it was too late?” Eve demanded. “If you really fuckin’ like somebody it doesn’t matter what time it is, if it was fuckin’ three o’clock in the mornin’ you would go over there.” When Eve said that, I was reminded of when Chris showed up to my house at three o’ clock and took me to the football field to have sex. Of any of the times that we had been together, that would be the night that always remembered and valued over all the others. She was right. The real reason why I had gone over to Chris’ house wasn’t because it was too late, but because I was afraid to see him.

“Let’s go,” Eve said, interrupting my thoughts.

“Where?” I asked.

“Hollywood,” Eve said sarcastically, “where the fuck do you think? Chris’ house. See if the asshole is there.”

“We can’t go there. I have to be in my physics class in like five minutes.”

“Fuck class. You’re tryin’ to fix a broken relationship. Who gives a fuck about physics?”

“Why do you care so much?” I questioned.

“I don’t,” Eve said. “Just gives me a reason not to be here.”

I smiled again. “What if he’s not there?”

“What if he is?”

“What if he doesn’t wanna see me?”

“What if he does? Stop tryin’ to find fuckin’ excuses not to do the damn thing and just do it.” Eve stood and brushed grass off her ass. “Get up and let’s go.”

I wanted to say, “No, I can’t.” But I figured Eve would come up with a clever response to refute why there was no real reason why I couldn’t go to Chris’ house. A part of me was still scared to see Chris, but at the same time I still wanted to see him. I stood up slowly and began to follow Eve to her fire-colored car. “I can’ believe I’m doin’ this shit.” I opened the car door and climbed inside. I had never skipped a class in all twelve years I had been in school. But it was an important reason to skip. 

Eve turned on the ignition, and I nearly jolted out of my seat when the radio blared to life, pumping loud-ass music that I knew would be able to be heard throughout the whole campus. Eve swerved out of the student parking lot and out the gates. I made sure I put on my seat belt. I turned down the volume a little.

“Where does he live?” Eve asked.

“Mosswood Avenue,” I told her. Eve accelerated the speed, paying no attention to the frequent speed bumps. I hit my head on the ceiling of the car a few times. Eve just laughed. After she stopped laughing, she asked, “What are you gonna say to him?”

I hadn’t thought about that at all. “I don’t know.”

“Well, you only got fifteen minutes to figure out.”

“I don’t even know if I really want to see him right now.”

“Too late now,” Eve said. “Besides, you gotta face him at some point anyway. You can try and pretend like it doesn’t bother you, but eventually it eats away at your ass like fuckin’ emotional termites until you feel like you’re fuckin’ goin’ to fall apart. Believe me, I know.”

* * *
We arrived at Chris’ house exactly fifteen minutes later as Eve said he would. His house was a lot smaller than mine, and a lot more run-down looking. But just every house on Chris’ block looked rundown, as though monsters lived inside of those houses instead of people. Even though it was daylight and nobody was around, I still felt a bit scared about getting out of the car.

“Go ahead,” Eve said.

I wanted to ask, “Can’t you come with me,” but that would’ve sounded stupid. I just looked at the house for a long time. I didn’t see Chris’ truck parked in the driveway or parked along the street. For some reason I didn’t take that as a major sign that he wasn’t home. Cautiously, I got out of the door and walked up to Chris’ porch. I could hear my heart beating. Once I got to his door, I thought about turning around and heading right back toward Eve’s car. But I didn’t. I rang the bell and tried to look casual. 

A minute passed and Chris didn’t come to the door. I figured that maybe he was sleep and hadn’t heard me ringing the doorbell, so I rang it again. Again, I waited - patiently. He still didn’t come to the door. He wasn’t home. His truck wasn’t anywhere to be seen and nobody came to the door. Chris wasn’t there. I had missed class to come see him and he wasn’t even home. Behind me, I heard Eve honk her horn and yell out the window, “Is he there?”

Disappointed, I turned around to go back to the car - when the door opened. I was a little startled because I wasn’t expecting anyone to answer. The man who answered the door wasn’t Chris, but looked a lot like him if Chris were about twenty-five years older. The man looked cold and emotionless, as though he had lost his soul years ago. 

He must’ve been good-looking when he was younger, like Chris was now, but there was so much anger and pain etched into his face that it was difficult to see the parts of the man that were once attractive. It was obvious to me that I was looking at Chris’ father. He stared at me with such hateful eyes, as though I had personally done something horrible to him. I wish I had gone back to Eve’s car sooner, because now I felt frozen. I couldn’t move.

“Who are you?” Chris’ father demanded.

I could barely talk. “...I know Chris. He’s a friend...I know Chris...”

The hatred in the man’s eyes intensified when I said Chris’ name. 

“Is he home?” I asked, more than a bit frightened to hear his response.

Mr. Green just stared at me with his penetrating dark eyes. I looked at him and hoped that Chris wouldn’t look like his father when he got to be his age. I hoped Chris didn’t look so perpetually enraged and hollow. “No,” Mr. Green said sharply. “He’s not here.” He was about to slam the door in my face, but I stopped him by asking:

“Do you know where he went?”

“No, I don’t know where he went,” Mr. Green said just as sternly. I was expecting him to finish the sentence with “And I don’t give a fuck either.”

I took a step back. “Well, if he comes back, can you tell him that Brandon came by?”

Mr. Green looked at me as if I were the stupidest person that ever existed. “That boy won’t be comin’ back here. Not to my house.” He said it so emphatically and with so much spirit, that there was no doubt that he was absolutely serious. “If you got anything to say to him, I suggest you find him wherever he might be.” Mr. Green slammed the door shut, leaving me out on the porch, intimidated and bewildered. I stood there on the porch for about another minute before I turned and went back to the car. 

“Who was that man?” Eve asked as I closed the car door.

“His father.”

“What did he say?” 

I didn’t say anything. The only thing I could think was: No wonder why Chris is the way he is.

To be continued...