My German Lover: The Epilogue

“… I don’t know what to say”, I told my parents as they were about to leave, the day they helped me to move into my new condo…

“You’ve earned it Jack”, my mum answered. “Now if you need anything, just call home…”

“Yes. Thanks mum. And thanks dad. Without you, I would never have made it…”

“… Just keep studying Jack. That’s all we’re asking from you. Make us proud of you…”, my dad answered with a smile on his face”

“…I will dad. I will. But I’ll never forget what you’re doing for me. Never!”, I answered.

After my parents had left, I sat on a chair and said to myself: “Mike… it’s all thanks to you. Without the insurance money, I would never have made it! Are you with me now? Are you? Cause if you’re not with me, I won’t stay here!”

You will say that I’m crazy but I really felt like Mike was in there with me! Yes, he was with me… 

And that first night into my condo, I took his guitar to my bed and I slept with it right beside me!

Two days later, I received a call from a well known store in Montréal. They wanted to know if I was going to be at home the day after…

“…Yes, I answered. But why?”

“We have a delivery to make to you. Do you have an elevator in your building?”

“…Yes… we have three, but I didn’t buy anything from your store. There must be a mistake…”

“Nope. There’s no mistake. Some one bought something from our store for you. There’s even a card attached to it…”

“But what is it?”

“Can’t tell”, the guy answered, laughing his ass off. “You’ll see for yourself tomorrow. How big are your elevators?”

“Two of them have normal size…but the third one is much bigger and is used by people that are moving in or out of the building. It’s quite large…”

“Perfect. We’ll ring your condo when we get to your building…”

“Fine. Are you sure you can’t tell me what it is you will deliver to me?”

“Sorry dude. My instructions are not to tell you. See you tomorrow…”

In the building where I live there’s a camera in the lobby so I can see on TV who’s there, calling for me to open the door. And the morning after I got that call what do you think I did? Yeah. As soon as I got up that day I switched the TV on, and waited for the delivery men to get here. I was curious and wanted to see from the lobby how big that “thing” was… so I could try to figure out what it was before they even made it to my floor…

Eventually the delivery men rang my condo. There were six of them. I answered and explained where they had to go in the lobby to find the big elevator. Then I saw them moving in something big. Very big! What the hell could that be, I asked to myself. I couldn’t see what it was because it was all wrapped up. Not being able to guess what it was, I just waited for the delivery men to make it to my floor where I was impatiently waiting for them.

“…What the hell is that?”, I asked them as soon as they reached my door…

They grinned and asked:

“… Where do you want us to place it?”

“Shit… I don’t even know what it is…”

“Oh… you don’t?”

“No…”

“A small grand piano about 1.5 meters (5 feet) long”

“A baby grand? Are you sure you’re not making a big mistake here? I never bought a baby grand from your store and I don’t see who would have bought one for me… I know how expensive a baby grand is…”

“All we know is that we must deliver that piano to you. Here… there’s an envelope for you…”

They helped me to move a few things around so the baby grand could be placed somewhere. Then, they took all the wrappings off. I was stunned! Totally stunned! It was so beautiful. A Steinway! The piano of my dreams!

I gave the guys a good tip and they left.

As soon as they were gone I sat down and I opened the envelope. There was a card in there and it said:

“From Will and Paul. Never stop playing. Never! You hear? Never! We love you Jacques! Keep playing for us, please.”

Of course, reading that card made me cry like a baby!

I had told Will and Paul that I had bought that condo. And of course, when Paul had asked me about my new address, I had given it to him without hesitation…

I looked at the piano, took the phone and called them right away…

“…You’re crazy”… I told them…

“…Oh… we take it you received a delivery…”, they answered, as both of them were on the phone…

“…I sure did! And you’re crazy! It’s the most beautiful gift I’ve ever received. Why did you do that, huh?”

“Didn’t you read our card?”, Will asked me…

“…Of course I did…”

“Well… we love you Jacques!”, Paul said…

“And I want to make sure you will not do what I did. I want you to keep playing… don’t ever stop playing… swear to me you won’t…”, Will said…

I just couldn’t answer his question at the moment as I was crying so much. And I knew that they were also crying at the end of the line…

“…Are you still there?”, Will asked a bit later…

“Yes…” I answered, sobbing… “I love you guys. You don’t know how much I love you!”

“…Have you tried it?”, Will asked…

“Not yet. I wanted to call you first…”

“Go. And try it while we’re on the phone. I want to hear you play…”, Will replied…

So I took the phone with me over to the piano. I sat on the bench, and with tears in my eyes, I began to play…

“…Did you hear it?”, I later asked…

“Yes”, they answered. “But you didn’t have to play all the song for us. You made the call and that long distance will cost you a fortune…” Paul answered, laughing…

“…I couldn’t care less about that! Did you hear it good…”

“Oh yes… we did”, Will answered. From the tone of his voice, I knew he was crying. “Jack?”, he asked…

“…Yes?”

“You keep playing, huh?”

“…I swear to you I will. I swear…”

“Thanks. That’s all I wanted to hear…”, Will answered…

“Don’t worry Will. Please…”, I replied…

“Good!”

I hung up the phone and look at the piano for a few moments. Then I said aloud:

“That song is for you Mike!”

And I began to play “Yolanda”.

I had problems with playing the song since I had so many tears in my eyes. But I played it to the end.

“…I love you Mike… I’ll always will. And I know you’re with me… Help me go on with my life Mike. Please, help me!”

And he did.

Soon I began to get adjusted to my new life. But now, I was living alone! No one was there, waiting for me when I was coming back from college. At first I found it hard to live alone but that didn’t last very long, since it didn’t take long for Richard to start coming to my place all the time!

And we went on with our swim training in my new indoor pool!

In fact, he was at my condo all the time at least until the day he met a new girlfriend! And when he did, I started to breathe easier. Sure I like Richard, but I needed some air to breathe and wanted to be left alone once in a while. And as soon as he started to go out with that girl, I noticed that he was not coming to my place as often as he used to. Thank God, I said to myself!

In November, we had a week off at college and I decided to take that week to go to France to visit with my family over there, and to go to Lyon. I called Mike’s parents to let them know I would go to see them and they insisted that I spend at least one night at their home with them. I agreed.

When I finally got there, we hugged and cried a lot. Loulou, Mike’s sister was there too and she hugged me so hard that it hurt!

“Hey… let me breathe Loulou…”, I told her, laughing…

“Sorry Jack. I’m so happy that you’re here. You don’t know how! And you’re gonna have my room tonight!”…

“Where are you going to sleep?”, I asked…

“On the sofa… in the living room. I don’t care…”, she answered, giving me a nice smile…

“But what about Mike’s bedroom?”, I ventured to ask…

“Mum has locked the door, and we don’t go there anymore. It’s just closed.”, she answered with a sad look on her face.

“I understand. But hey… I’ll take the sofa. Keep your room Loulou…”

“That’s out of the question. You’ll take my room. Period…”

The morning after, Loulou and I went to the cemetery to visit Mike’s grave. Loulou was holding my hand all the time. I looked at his tombstone and saw that, under his name, his parents had paid so that the following quotation could be engraved: “Avec toi pour toujours mon amour” (With you for ever my love). Mike’s parents had asked me if I wanted something to be engraved on his tombstone, and that’s what I had said I wanted. And they had made sure my wish was respected.

Loulou and I knelt, and we prayed in silence for a while. I had brought flowers and placed them over his grave. Then I dug a little hole into the ground, removed some earth from it and put it in a small bottle I had brought with me. Then, I took another small bottle from my pocket, opened it and drop its contents into the hole that I had dug…

“What’s that?, Loulou asked me…

“It’s sand. I took it from the beach in Martinique, in front of our house. I took it from the exact spot where Mike and I used to sit almost every evening, to watch the sea together…”

“…You miss him huh?”, she asked, with her eyes filled with tears…

“So much Loulou.”

As we were now sitting on the grass side by side, Loulou leaned on to me to rest her head on my shoulder…

“…We miss him too Jack. I miss him…”

“It feels good to be here with you Loulou. Thanks. I needed to come…”

“You’ll always be welcome Jack. Please, never forget us…”

“I’ll never forget you. Don’t worry. But hey… you can travel too you know. You could come to see me in Montréal, or come to spend some time with me in Martinique one day… You’d stay at our house…”

“I’d love that. Yeah. Maybe… We’ll see…”

“I sure hope you will come Loulou. Being with you is a bit like being with Mike. It makes me feel good…”

When I came back to Montréal, I carefully strapped the small bottle filled with the earth from Mike’s grave inside my piano… “That way, you will inspire me each time I play…” I told Mike, just like if he was there with me…

Early in December, I got a call from Paul…

“…I’m afraid we have bad news…”, he told me…

“What? What bad news?”

“Ludwig’s wife passed away last night…”

“WHAT? But… she wasn’t sick as far as I know…”

“Yes she was. She had lung cancer and when it was discovered, it was already too late…”

“When will she be buried?”

“…Tomorrow…”

“But… I’ll never make it on time… I’ll never be able to get a place on a plane to Martinique on such a short notice…”

“I know. But don’t worry: Ludwig will understand.”

“How is he doing?”

“Not too bad under the circumstances….”

“Do you think I could call him? He was there for me when I needed him… He has always been there for me… I’d like to talk to him…”

“You could call here later tonight. His wife will rest in state in our drawing room… Ludwig will be here, so if you want to talk to him…”

“Yes. I will call. Thanks Paul! I’m so sorry…”

“We know you are. We all are…”

Later that night, I called back and talked to Ludwig… In fact, I should say we cried more than we talked…

“…I wish I could be there with you Ludwig!”, I said at one point, sobbing…

“I know that if you could be here my friend, you would…”

“I’ll be there for the Christmas holidays… That’s not too far away…”

“I’ll see you then Jack. Pray for her soul, will you?”

“I will Ludwig. And tomorrow, my spirit will be there with you…”

“Thanks. I appreciate…”

That year, we all went to Martinique to spend the Christmas holidays at our house. My brother Robert was there with us, along with his “fiancée” Julie.

Of course, we all went to see Ludwig… to tell him how sad we felt, and to express our sympathy to him…

“… Thanks”, he answered… “Oh, and by the way… I must tell you that we will no longer be neighbors…”

“Oh?”, My dad said…

“Yes… I’ve decided to move back into the mansion with the others. I was lonely, living in that big house all alone. Beside, André my grandson is getting married next April and I want him to take the house. So André and his new wife will be your new neighbors…”

“He’s getting married?”, I exclaimed… “Wow. I’m happy for him… Do we know the bride?”

“I think you do… it’s Jaqueline…”

“Oh yes… nice girl!”, I answered, smiling…

“Yes. We all love her…”, Ludwig answered…

A few days later my brother asked me: “Hey Jack… Julie and I are going to Fort-de-France tomorrow… want to come with us?”

“Sure. Why not…”

“… You know… there’s just one road we can take to go there, and I was thinking that, maybe…”

“Look Robert… Thanks for thinking about that. Since the accident, I’ve taken that road a few times and we took it the other day when we came from the Airport. I don’t mind. I just can’t avoid it, can I?”

“Right.”

My dad had bought a new car, to replace the other one that had been totally scrapped in the accident… and so the day after, Robert drove us to Fort-de-France. As Robert and Julie were shopping, I took the car and went to see François. He was so happy to se me…

Later, Robert Julie and I went to a restaurant and had a good lunch…

“So Jack, how does it feel to be back here at Fort-de-France?”, my brother asked…

“I’m just fine Robert. Don’t worry. I’m stronger than you think bro. Stop worrying for me…”, I answered with a nice smile on my face…

“Hey… you’re my baby brother… I’ll never stop worrying about you…”, he answered, looking at me straight in the eyes…

“Yeah. Thanks. But as I said, I’m doing just fine… And so Julie: How do you like Fort-de-France?”

“…It’s so beautiful. I love the city! I was expecting to find a small city… but it’s big!”

“Yes it is. It’s a nice city.”, Robert answered…

“Hey guys”, I said… “Do you know what we should do tomorrow? Take the sailboat out and sail over to St.Lucia. Tomorrow night we could spend the night over there since it will be Friday night…and each Friday night, they have a big party at Rodney bay. It will be so much fun. Mike and I had been there a few times…”

“…Hey, why not! That would be fun…”, my brother answered… 

That night, as soon as we got back home, I called André, Ludwig’s grandson, to ask him if he wanted to come with us to St.Lucia since we needed to have at least three guys to sail the boat over there. He accepted the offer with great pleasure and we agreed he would be at our house at seven o’clock the morning after…

“…So guys… where in St.Lucia are you planning to go?”, André asked us the morning after…

“Well I was thinking that we could sail to Rodney Bay, for the happy hour at “Le Lime”… then sail to Gros-Îslet… you know how it is over there on a Friday night…”

“Yeah”, André answered, laughing… “Half of Martinique is over there on Friday nights. Well guys, let’s go then…”

Once aboard our boat I looked at Julie and told her to put her life-jacket on, and my brother gave her a large bucket…

“Why should I put my life-jacket on?”, she asked me… “With such a big boat I’m sure there’s no danger…”

I grinned and answered:

“You’ve never sailed to St.Lucia before, have you?”

“No. I’ve never been there before…”

“Well… you see, the Caribbean Sea is very calm here and it will stay calm until the moment we see the “Table du Diable”. It’s a small island… Right after that island we’ll enter the Saint Lucia Channel and as soon as we get there the sea will get rough… And when I say rough believe me Julie, I mean real rough! The boat will dance between big waves like a cork… I don’t want to scare you… there’s no need to be scared, really… but it will be like riding a roller coaster… so I think it’s better for you to put your life-jacket on, just in case. And the bucket, well let’s just say you better keep it near you…” I finally said, grinning…